Houselog Family: Today

WELCOME TO OUR WORLD!!!

Welcome to our journey of love, living in the face of loss and just plain living. We've experienced the greatest loss a parent can face--the loss our our baby daughter, Sylvia. She flew to Heaven due to complications of congenital diaphragmatic hernia (CDH) on 2/26/09. We have two "Earth Angel" children, Will and Stella. They have been a great help on this journey. We live a blessed rich life in spite of our loss. We are lucky to be parents to such special children. They are our life. Welcome to our life!

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Today

Today I find myself in a completely different place than I was last year at this time. Today was the U of I memorial service. It was very nice. Last year we had lot of family attend with us. Afterwards, we had a pizza picnic. It was exhausting. Grief is exhausting. So, we decided that just Andy and I would go this year. It was nice. It was nice to visit about life, about her, about the future on the car ride. On the way back, I kept thinking how very blessed I am. I'm blessed to have a wonderful husband and my children. I'll always wish all three are here on Earth with me--that's just a reality that I've been trying to accept. I will never be whole. Last night Andy and I talked about heaven. I know I've probably mentioned my views of heaven before. I hope to get some answers from the Big Man when I get there. I want to give Him a piece of my mind! I also look forward to being reunited with my Sylvia. I read a bereaved mother's view on what her little angel is doing in heaven. She said she thinks of her daughter as running in a field of wildflowers so completely taken in the moment that when she finally stops to turn around, she says, "Oh there you are mom," like she never stopped to really miss her mother. That is my hope for Sylvia. Andy intends on laying into God also, but he doesn't think he'll get any answers. He thinks the answer will come in the form of being reunited with Sylvia--that when He reveals her to us, we'll be so completely taken in the moment of love and forget about wanting to know any answers. All that will matter is seeing her there and watching our children on Earth from above. That is our hope at least. The only thing I REALLY want of this life is for my Earthly children to far outlive both of their parents.
I ask for prayers for a blogger friend of mine going through her rainbow pregnancy. She is pregnant with twins and the fear has set in for her--the fear of the unknown, the fear of loss. Her angel daughter, Peyton, was BORN with cancer. What a cruel world in which we live. Check out her blog at http://onceamother.blogspot.com
She has a link to my blog on her site. Seeing people link my blog to their page makes me feel good--like people read what I write! lol!

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A Child Loaned

"I'll lend you for a little time, a child of mine," He said, "for you to love the while she lives, and mourn for when she's dead. It may be six or seven years, or twenty-two or three, but will you 'til I call her back, take care of her for me? She'll bring her charms to gladden you, and should her stay be brief, you'll have her lovely memories as solace for your grief. I cannot promise she will stay, since all from earth return, but there are lessons taught down there, I want this child to learn. I've looked this wide world over in my search for teachers true, and from the throngs that crowds life's lane, I have selected you! Now will you give her all your love, not think the labor vain, nor hate me when I come to call, and take her back again?"I fancied that I heard them say "Dear Lord, Thy will be done," for all the joy the child shall bring, the risk of grief we'll run. We'll shelter her with tenderness, we'll love her while we may, and for the happiness we've known, forever grateful stay. But should the angels call for her, much sooner than we planned, we'll brave the bitter grief that comes and try to understand.
Anonymous

The Chosen Ones

The Chosen Ones
I had a dream the other night. It came to me so clear. I stood before the throne of God, afraid to come too near. God said to me, "I hear your prayers. There are answers you can't find. I brought you here to talk to me and help to ease your mind. "I said,"Well, yes, God, I am upset...About my special one. This punishment is awfully harsh...Whatever have I done?" God looked at me and shook his head, He said, "My Dear, you've got it wrong. I sent this special child to you because you are so strong. I searched and searched to try and find someone with a love so rare. Parents so unselfish they could give her that special care. I try to save my special gifts, like those you're speaking of, for a special kind of parents I call the 'Chosen Ones. 'Of all the ones to choose from, I know I've got it done...Parents who deserve my best, an honor you have won." -Unknown

Houselog Family

WELCOME TO OUR WORLD!!!

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Sunday, July 25, 2010

Today

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