Stella's Baptism

Stella was baptized at the 5:00pm Mass at St. Anthony's on April 10th. She was amazing. (Her brother was not!) Stella wore a beautiful white gown. She looked so sweet. I was (and am) so proud of her. Her little white shoes over her little white tights--adorable! She wore her matching bonnet for pictures. It was so surreal to be holding this living baby in my arms in her Baptismal outfit. Last time I saw my own daughter in her Baptismal gown was in her little casket. Thoughts of Sylvia defintely went through my mind for that is the imprint of Sylvi that most have on their minds--her in that beautiful gown. That's the only time most of our world ever saw her. Right before Mass as we were lined up waiting to march our baby up the aisle--a very proud moment I must say--I almost lost it. I looked at Stella sleeping in my arms. I kissed her. I kissed her extra long to make sure I felt her breath on my mouth. Life...Thank you God for the life of Stella. Thank you for letting me be present at this daughter's Baptism for I missed it all with Sylvia. Know that Stella will grow in your grace and love. She will know you. I believe she already does. We will teach her how to be a good Christian by emulating your example of what it is to be good... I know her godparents and all her family will help with this, but we will be her daily teachers. We will bring her up in a faith we believe in. It may not all be by the book, but it is our faith and it is a good faith. This family has proven its strong faith in the last year. My faith was shaken to the core, but we remain faithful to you. We even thank you for everything you've brought us in the last couple years--good and bad. While I will always wish Sylvia were here with me, I thank YOU for letting me be the one to be her mom--letting me be the only one to hold her in her short little life--letting me be around when she took the very few breaths she did take on her own--letting me be the one whose arms she died in--letting me be the one to carry this grief and this grace...Seems like when I get writing about this topic, I could go on and on. But I want this post to be about Stella so back to My Little Star.
Anyhow, she looked soooooooo beautiful. She slept through most of the church service. Will was taken out for some very long stints. I wish he would have been present for her actual Baptism, but he was being naughty. I think Papa Houselog was ready for some whiskey after that Mass! :) When the water was being poured over her head, she was sleeping. She stretched her head way back--archced so the congregation could see her. She didn't wake up. She woke for only a couple minutes of the entire Mass. Hope she's always that good for the infant stage:)